Everyone experiences difficult times in life where stress can become overwhelming and our mental health and well-being can suffer. 1 in 2 Australians will be affected by a mental health condition at some point in their lives and 1 in 5 are affected each year.  

A relationship breakdown, losing a job, grieving a loss, homelessness and physical or mental illness are just some of the problems that may affect our mental health and well-being. Other factors such as racial or sexual discrimination, identifying as LGBTIQA+, socio-economic disadvantage and social or geographic isolation can also be associated with an increased risk of experiencing poor mental health.   

How men and women react to these situations can be quite different. While the reasons for this can be varied and complex, society tends to teach men to associate getting help and talking about their feelings with being weak. A result of this is that men are less likely to seek support and to disclose a mental health problem to friends or family. Many men may also cope in less healthy ways than women, including by drinking more, taking more risks, and isolating themselves. This can lead to greater feelings loneliness and depression and higher rates of self-inflicted injuries and suicide. Even though the rate of mental health disorders is about the same for men and women, men are more likely to die because of alcohol and drug use than women and the number of suicide deaths is approximately three times higher in males than females [1].

It is important to recognise that there are things we can do to better help us get through tough times and that seeking help early can make a big difference. Men who do reach out for help have better mental health outcomes and are more likely to choose healthier coping strategies. Recognising the early signs of stress and declining mental health can be an important step towards getting support. 

Physical symptoms can be a more obvious sign before recognising your feelings about a situation. By paying attention to how your body is feeling and any changes in your physical health, behaviour and emotions you can begin to recognise and address how you are feeling. Family or friends may also notice things about your wellbeing or behaviour and try to point these out to you and offer support. These can include things like: 

• Headaches, muscle aches/tension 
• Changes in weight 
• Always feeling tired; lacking energy or motivation 
• Feeling down or depressed a lot of the time 
• Increased use of alcohol or drugs or increased gambling 
• Withdrawing from friends and family; becoming distant 
• Having difficulty concentrating, difficulty sleeping or sleeping all the time 
• Losing interest in activities that you usually enjoy 
• Feeling hopeless, or like you’re a “failure” or a burden to others  
• Increased nervousness, agitation, restlessness or fidgeting 
• Thoughts of harming yourself or others  
• Feeling hopeless and like nothing you do will fix the situation  

These can be common reactions to difficult circumstances, but if they continue for a long period of time they can have a negative impact on your physical and mental health (ie. heart disease, ulcers, depression, anxiety).  Even when it is difficult to see a way forward, there are a number of steps you can take to help shift things in a positive direction: 

1. Talk to someone. Sharing what you’re going through can help alleviate your stress and any feelings of aggression or isolation. You may also learn that others have gone through similar experiences and can offer ways of coping that you haven’t thought of. If you don’t feel comfortable talking to anyone you know, there are plenty of other people who can help. Talking to your GP can be a good place to start, as they are someone you may already have a trusted relationship with who can also take your medical history and other considerations into account. A GP can also refer you to a mental health professional or other people or services that can help. There are also a number of ‘non-traditional’ ways that counselling can be provided, such as phone counselling, online and other digital services (see resource list below).
2. Look after your physical health. Eating healthy food, exercising and doing activities that you enjoy can improve how you feel. Exercise is particularly important, as it relieves stress, helps you to sleep better, can connect you with friends and keeps you fit and healthy. Finding a buddy to exercise with or joining a gym or sports club are great ways to get motivated and connect to others.
3. Limit your intake of alcohol and drugs, including caffeine and nicotine. Alcohol and drugs can impair your judgment, leading to poor decisions and other risky behaviour. They can have a damaging effect on your relationships with your family and friends and your work. They can also have a serious impact on your physical health and can lead to aggression, agitation and increase any depression, anxiety or psychosis. 
4. Take small steps to tackle problems. Sometimes, if you’re feeling out of control or hopeless, it can help to be proactive and come up with some practical ways to manage your situation. For example, if you are experiencing financial difficulties, you might consider attending a workshop in budgeting, creating a family budget or talking to your bank or financial adviser about ways to better manage your finances. Stay positive and focus on what you can do, rather than what is out of your control.
5. Stay connected. Catching up with friends and loved ones, or getting involved in your community can also help you to stay connected. Joining a local group or club, volunteering or trying a new hobby are great ways to take your mind off things, meet new people and shift your perspective. Joining a men’s shed can also be a great way to connect with others while working on projects in a safe atmosphere of mateship without any pressure. There are many men's sheds all over Australia, to find one near you visit www.mensheds.com.au.
6. Learn more about mental health by going online and connecting with mental health resources and groups. There are many great websites that can provide a greater understanding of what you may be going through and offer ways to help you get through tough times. 

Effectively managing your mental health improves your quality of life, increases your capacity to support your family and friends, and lets you perform at your best. Whether you reach out to a mate or a family member or decide to speak with a professional, recognising that everyone goes through challenges at different points in their life and getting support early are important steps to keeping your mental health and well-being strong.

References

[1] Australian Bureau of Statistics – Causes of Death, Australia, 2019

Connect with a mental health provider or other support:

There are many mental health service providers, support groups and online resources available. Contact Head to Health on 1800 595 212 to talk to a mental health professional and be connected to the support you need. For urgent support, call Lifeline on 13 11 14 or SuicideLine on 1300 651 251. If you need immediate help or are at risk of harm to yourself or others, call 000 now.

Here are a few other places you can find some help:

• NT Mental Health Line: 1 800 682 288
• MensLine Australia - 1300 789 978 | A free telephone and online counselling service offering support for Australian men anywhere, anytime.
• Team Talk – 1800 832 600 | www.teamhealth.asn.au
• headspace – 1800 650 890 | www.headspace.org.au
• Defence Force all-hours support line on 1800 628 036.
• Beyond Blue - www.beyondblue.org.au/mental-health
• Melaleuca Australia - 08 8985 3311  l  Counselling and wellbeing services for refugees, immigrants and other individuals from culturally diverse backgrounds.
• QLife line – 1800 184 527 | www.qlife.org.au
• Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander - 13YARN – 13 92 76 l  www.13yarn.org.au
• Kids Helpline – 1800 551 800 | www.kidshelpline.com.au

Other mental health support and resources for men:

• Are you bogged mate? Are you bogged mate? aims to boost awareness and start a conversation with the broader community about the rising issue of depression and suicide rates among men in rural areas. 
• Gambling help online: 1 800 858 858  l  Free online support for anyone affected by gambling 
• Mates in Construction - 1300 642 111 l  MATES offer a support line and case management to workers who need help and support.
• Darwin Indigenous Men's Service - 08 8947 7188  l  Mentoring, support, case management and outreach services where men can seek support to deal with or heal from issues such as grief, loss and trauma.
• Brother to Another - A Darwin-based First Nations men's developed, governed and lead charity, that aims to guide and empower First Nation’s young people, families and communities towards the tools, resources, and life skills necessary for healing.   
• Red Dust Healing  - Alice Springs - 03 9818 1744 / Darwin - 03 9818 1744  l  Innovative health, well-being and reconciliation programs co-designed in partnership with remote communities.
• King's Narrative -  Alice Springs based profit for purpose social enterprise founded and led by Aboriginal men. Programs that put culture up front to do the therapeutic healing work required for real change underneath.